Specialty
Therapy for codependency
In your closest relationships, you're the manager: of moods, of crises, of everyone's okay-ness. You can read a partner's state from the sound of their keys in the door. What you can't easily say is how you are, because somewhere along the way their feelings became your job and yours became background noise.
How it tends to show up
Codependent patterns are easy to mistake for love, because they look like devotion: the anticipating, the fixing, the endless second chances. The difference is what happens to you in the process. Love leaves room for two people. This pattern slowly erases one of them.
It shows up with partners most visibly, but the same shape often runs through family relationships and friendships too: you as the strong one, the helper, the one who holds everything so nobody else has to.
Where it comes from
You learned early that love had a job description.
These patterns usually trace back to early relationships where connection depended on being useful: where a parent's moods needed managing, or being low-maintenance was how you stayed loved. Attachment wiring like that doesn't disappear on its own. It just finds new relationships to run in.
Together we work at both levels: understanding the attachment patterns underneath, often with help from Internal Family Systems, while practicing something different in the present. Feeling your own feelings while someone else has theirs. Letting people carry what is theirs to carry. Boundaries here are not distance. They are what makes real closeness possible, because both people finally get to be in the room.
Book a Free ConsultationSessions are held by secure telehealth from anywhere in Texas or California. Also see people-pleasing and perfectionism, which often travel with this pattern.